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 Garth Snow – General Manager Allow Anonymous Users Reply to This Topic...
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Ryan Harper
PickupHockey Pro

322 Posts

Posted - 07/24/2006 :  08:50:20  Show Profile
Garth got his first taste of the front office last week during the arbitration hearing between him and Mike York. Here is how it may have gone down:

Garth: “Hello Mike”

Mike: “Hi Garth”

Garth: “How’s the wife and kids?”

Mike: “Good, thanks for asking. How about yours?”

Garth: “Great, thanks.”

Arbitrator: “Alright gentlemen, its time to get down to business.”

Garth: “Oh sorry, it’s just that I’m new. I guess you could say this is my first day.”

Arbitrator: -Rolls eyes-

Lawyer: -Whispers in Garth’s ear-

Garth: “They...I mean I must point out that although last season was a decent one for Mike, he was a minus nine and a defensive liability. I feel that…uh…”

Lawyer: -Whispers in Garth’s ear-

Garth: “I feel that this coupled with the fact that he scored a career low 13 goals are the main factors in our reasoning for making the qualifying offer.”

Mike: “Me…a defensive liability? You are the one with a save percentage below .900 and a goals against average of almost four. And four wins Garth?”

Garth: “Well look who I had playing in front of me!”

Arbitrator: “Calm down gentlemen.”

Garth: “I apologize for the outburst. Mike, it’s just that we are working against the cap here and…”

Mike: “Right. So what you’re saying is that because your salary counts against the team’s cap, I can’t get a raise?”

Garth: -Turns to lawyer and whispers- “My salary counts against the cap?”

Lawyer: -Nods to confirm-

Mike: “And how is it that Alexei is making $7.6 million? The guy scored only 14 more points than I did last season. And he was a minus fourteen. I feel I deserve at least $3 million.”

Garth: -speechless-

Arbitrator: “Alright gentlemen I believe that I have heard enough. I will have a ruling for you within 48 hours.”

The arbitrator awarded York a one year - $2.85 million contract. Garth Snow has 48 hours to accept the ruling or York will become and unrestricted free agent. Welcome to management Garth!

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